Duryodhana’s jealousy and enmity with the Pandavas are well-known right from their childhood. The competition between them has always taken the form of jealousy, frustration, and anger. The first encounter with Duryodhana of Karna happened when the Princesses of Kuru (Pandavas and Kauravas) were displaying their skills at the end of the learning with Guru Dronacharya.
When Arjun was about to be declared as the best Archer, Karna challenged Arjuna. Karna was considered as Sutaputra (Son of a Charioteer) and hence was not permitted. Duryodhana saw that as an opportunity to create a challenge for Pandavas and make them lose. He declared Karna as King of Anga (current days Bihar / Bengal). Karna perceived this as a noble gesture and accepted it.
The relationship as viewed from Karna’s side
The relationship from Duryodhana’s side was
Krishna and Sudama spent a short period together during the Gurukulvasa of Krishna. The friendships here were pure, with no expectations of each other. The friendships remained even when they were separated after their studies in the ashram. There was a huge gap in terms of social-economic status between them.
The story of how Krishna treated Sudama when Sudama visited his palace is well known. In a true friendship, communication is on an emotional level, and they do not ask for worldly objects, as true friendship considers that as a critical aspect of friendship.
The relationship and feelings were mutual.
Compared to this, “friendship” between Duryodhana and Karna was with purpose and agenda.
Krishna and Arjuna are considered to be prime examples of Sakha Bhava. The friendship between them goes through several forms, but the bonding is a reflection of “friend in need” in every form.” When necessary, Krishna did not hesitate in guiding Arjuna as Guru while rendering Bhagavad Geetha. Krishna never hesitated in stating the bitter truth when essential, while supporting all the time when Arjuna needed.
The friendship between them was not with any expected support. Even before the war, when Duryodhana and Arjun went to Krishna. Arjuna asked for him in place of his army. That reflects the trust and relationship that Arjuna had with Krishna.
Compared to this, Karna sided with Duryodhana even when Karna knew that it is wrong.
In आपद्धर्मपर्व (Apad Dharma Parva), Bhisma responds to a question from Yudhistara on Friendship/ Alliances.
Bhishma said the people of the following type are not worthy to be friend.
लुब्धः क्रूरस्त्यक्तधर्मा निकृतिः शठ एव च।
क्षुद्रः पापसमाचारः सर्वशङ्की तथाऽलसः॥
दीर्घसूत्रोऽनृजुः क्रुष्टो गुरुदारप्रधर्पकः।
व्यसने यः परित्यागी दुरात्मा निरपत्रपः॥
सर्वतः पापदर्शी च नास्तिको वेदनिन्दकः।
संप्रकीर्णेन्दियो लोके यः कालनिरतश्चरेत्॥
असभ्यो लोकविद्विष्टः समये चानवस्थितः।
पिशुनोऽथाकृतप्रज्ञो मत्सरी पापनिश्चयः॥
दुःशीलोऽथाकृतात्मा च नृशंसः कितवस्तथा।
मित्रैरपकृतिर्नित्यमटतेऽर्थं धनेप्सया॥
ददतश्च यथाशक्ति यो न तुष्यति मन्दधीः।
अधैर्यमपि यो युङ्क्ते सदा मित्रं नराधमः॥
अस्थानक्रोधनो यश्च अकस्माच्च विरज्यते।
सुहृदश्चैव कल्याणानाशु त्यजति किल्बिपी॥
अल्पेऽप्यपकृते मूढे न संस्मरनि यत्कृतम्।
कार्यसेवी च मित्रेषु मित्रद्वेषी नराधिप।
शत्रुर्मित्रमुखो यश्च जिह्नप्रेक्षी विलोचनः।
न तुष्यति च कल्याणे यम्त्यजेत्तादृशं नरम्॥
पानपो द्वेषणः क्रोधी निर्घृणः परुपस्तथा।
परोपतापी मित्रध्रुक् तथा प्राणिवधे रतः॥
कृतघ्नश्चाधमो लोके न सन्धेयः कथंचन।
मित्रद्वेषी ह्यसंधेयः सन्धेयानपि मे शृणु॥
The list, as sighted by Bhishma is pretty long. Some of them are anyone Greedy, Cruel, Denounces Dharma, Crooked, Inferior, Suspicious of everyone, lazy, Sinful, Procrastinator, Liar, Shameless, Nonbeliever, Escapist, Jealousy of others, Cunning, Speaks ill. Many of the characteristics would apply to Duryodhana. Hence, he is not a friend worthy. But Karna accepted his as it is with full knowledge because of his indebtedness to him.
Bhishma also mentioned who all should be considered as friends.
कुलीना वाक्यसंपन्ना ज्ञानविज्ञानकोविदाः।
रूपवन्तो गुणोपेतास्तथाऽलुब्धा जितश्रमाः॥
सन्मित्राश्च कृतज्ञाश्च सर्वज्ञा लोभवर्जिताः।
माधुर्यगुणसंपन्नाः सत्यसन्धा जितेन्द्रियाः॥
व्यायामशीलाः सततं भृत्यपुत्राः कुलोद्वहाः।
दोषैः प्रमुक्ताः प्रथितास्ते ग्राह्याः पार्थिवैर्नराः॥
यथाशक्ति समाचाराः संप्रतुष्यन्ति हि प्रभो।
नास्थाने क्रोधवन्तश्च न चाकस्माद्विरागिणः॥
विरक्ताश्च न दुष्यन्ति मनसाऽप्यर्थकोविदाः।
आत्मानं पीडयित्वाऽपि सुहृत्कार्यपरायणाः।
विरज्यन्ति न मित्रेभ्यो वासो रक्तमिवाविकम्॥
दोषांश्च लोभमोहादीनर्थेषु युवतीपु च।
न दर्शयन्ति सुहृदो विश्वस्ता बन्धुवत्सलाः॥
लोष्टकाञ्चनतुल्यार्थाः सुहृत्सु दृढबुद्धयः।
ये चरन्त्यनभीमाना निसृष्टार्थविभूषणाः।
संगृह्णन्तः परिजनं स्वाम्यर्थपरमाः सदा॥
ईदृशैः पुरुषश्रेष्ठैर्यः सन्धिं कुरुते नृपः।
तस्य विस्तीर्यते राज्यं ज्योत्स्ना ग्रहपतेरिव॥
सत्ववन्तो जितक्रोधा बलवन्तो रणे सदा।
जन्मशीलगुणोपेताः सन्धेयाः पुरुषोत्तमाः।
The list of characteristics includes speaking the truth, communicating well, accomplished, intelligent, under his own control, satisfied, not greedy, trustworthy, and controlling their emotions.
People indeed consider their relationship as an example of friendship. This is primarily because of Karna, who stood by Duryodhana in all situations. We should not confuse that with friendship. It was a kind of one side friendship. While Karna treated that like friendship, but for Duryodhana, Karna was a trump card for Arjuna.
Today’s materialistic world has a very different meaning of friendship, and we often see it as more being together in all weathers. However, if one is a friend in crime, the law would not spare someone just because he was a friend. The current thinking approach is based on the short-term joy that each provides.
Note: This article was first published on the Blog Site of Amrita Vishwa Vidyapeetham
Embark on Your Journey of Growth with Subramaniam’s Insights – Where Wisdom Guides Success.